In the modern world, finding and keeping true love is one of the hardest things to do. You may find yourself attracted to someone and enjoy being around them. You may even care for them. But is it true love?
If you’re feeling a bit lost, and questioning what your relationship really means, there is a guide that can tell you what true love is. It’s a guide that’s been around for two thousand years, whose timeless truth has been proven by generations. To recognize true love, look no further than the Bible and its Author, the very source of love.
Here are 16 signs of genuine love according to the Scriptures:
1. You’ve allowed God to write your love story.
True love comes when our hearts and minds are prepared to be with another person. We cannot be impatient, or force it to happen at the wrong time.
“I realized that you were ready for love. I made a solemn promise and entered into a covenant with you, and you became mine.” – Ezekiel 16:8 NIV
2. You maintain a close relationship with God.
You do your best to understand His will, and you pray to Him to guide your decisions and give you wisdom.
“Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. 8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.” – 1 John 4:7-8 KJV
Also read: God’s Love vs Human Love: 13 Differences You Should Know
3. You feel no fear with this relationship.
You are secure with where you stand with your loved one, and confident of your future together.
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” – 1 John 4:18 KJV
4. You have compassion and forgiveness for your partner’s shortcomings.
In every relationship, mistakes are inevitable. True love remains calm and patient, and accepts apologies with grace. True love does not keep bringing up past mistakes.
“Love is patient, love is kind, it isn’t jealous, it doesn’t brag, it isn’t arrogant.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4 NIV
5. You feel inspired to take actions that help you and your loved one grow together, and benefit those around you.
You do what is required of you with a cheerful heart. True love is not just an emotion; it has to be demonstrated in the things that you do.
“Let all that you do be done in love.” – 1 Corinthians 16:14 ESV
“Little children, let’s not love with words or speech but with action and truth. This is how we will know that we belong to the truth and reassure our hearts in God’s presence.” – 1 John 3:18-19 NIV
6. You exercise the virtues of your faith.
True love motivates you to act out your Christian beliefs and translate them into actions.
“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” – Colossians 3:12-14 ESV
Also read: 13 Great Ways to Truly Love God
7. You are always honest.
True love makes you feel safe in saying how you really feel, and what you really think. There is no need to pretend to be someone you’re not. When you are your authentic self, you are free to love more deeply.
“Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good.” – Romans 12:9 KJV
8. You have the same goals and values.
Caring and attraction may give you a connection with someone. But for love that lasts, you have to be definite about what your purpose in life is, and choose someone with whom you can be unified in your goals.
“Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.” – Philippians 2:2 KJV
9. You prioritize your relationship over material things.
We live in a material world indeed. A clear indicator of true love is having your values shift away from acquiring possessions and wanting other people’s admiration and envy. Instead, you begin to focus on how you can grow as a person.
“Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.” – 1 John 2:15 KJV
10. You do not act selfishly.
True love makes you aware of each other’s needs, and you take care of each other before satisfying your own desires.
“You were called to freedom, brothers and sisters; only don’t let this freedom be an opportunity to indulge your selfish impulses, but serve each other through love.” – Galatians 5:13 NIV
Also read: True Love vs. Unconditional Love: 7 Differences You Should Know
11. You act with wisdom.
Being “in love” can sometimes make people feel like they have a reason to act impulsively, and do things that would not be good for them or their partner in the long-term. True love looks to the future, not just the present. You become more prudent with your decisions because you understand the consequences.
“And this I pray, that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in all judgment.” – Philippians 1:9 KJV
12. You take care of yourself and your needs.
Similar to acting impulsively, neglecting your own well-being in the service of another will not allow love to last. To love another, you have to love yourself.
“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” – Ephesians 5:28 KJV
13. Your partner shares your faith.
True love is always a partnership. You cannot keep it on the right path on your own.
“Don’t be tied up as equal partners with people who don’t believe. What does righteousness share with that which is outside the Law? What relationship does light have with darkness?” – 2 Corinthians 6:14 NIV
14. You are hopeful.
There are many things that can create difficulties in your relationship. Life is full of unpredictable factors that can strain your connection. Love is made real when you trust each other and overcome challenges together.
“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 8 Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever!” – 1 Corinthians 13:7-8 NLT
15. You are humble and content.
Finding true love means that you feel secure with who you are and what you have. You feel no need to compare yourself with others, because you find complete acceptance in the one you love.
“Love is patient, love is kind, it isn’t jealous, it doesn’t brag, it isn’t arrogant.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4 NIV
Also read: How to be Humble in a Relationship: 14 Ways
16. You understand each other fully.
People are complicated, and we all have hidden sorrows and secrets, sometimes even secrets that we keep from ourselves. True love allows us to see each other and ourselves in everything that we are, including our imperfections.
“For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.” – 1 Corinthians 13:12 ESV
Final thoughts
True love can be difficult, even painful at times, because true love requires sacrifice. But there is no higher purpose in our life, and nothing more fulfilling. If you feel called to share your life with someone special, hopefully this guide can help you shape your relationship so that you can give your best self.
Also read: 15 Signs of True Love in a Relationship
