How to be Honest in a Relationship: 12 Ways

honest in relationship
Photo by Travis Grossen

Trust is very crucial in any kind of relationship. Without it, it is hard to stay committed to a person. As a result, most relationships with trust issues do not last long.

If you want your partner to keep trusting you, then you need to be honest with them all the time. Honesty plays a significant role in sustaining trust between a couple.

Do you want to stop lying to your partner? Check out these ways on how to be honest in your relationship.


1. Avoid lying at any cost.

Mistrust starts with lies. Once your partner has discovered you telling lies, they would have a hard time believing what you say. People who have been constantly lied to in a relationship usually become suspicious of their partners. They cannot help wondering when their partners could be telling the truth or not.

Therefore, do not think small or white lies are not a big deal. They are to your partner. Also, it is better to be completely frank about what you feel, think, or do than sugarcoat things.


2. Confess your mistakes as soon as possible.

Of course, human as you are, there are times that you commit mistakes. However, instead of trying to hide them from your partner, open up about them as soon as possible. It would be better for your boyfriend or girlfriend to hear the truth directly from you than find it out from others.

Hiding your mistakes from your partner will make you appear more guilty. Once found out, your boyfriend or girlfriend will feel very hurt. It would be harder for the person to forgive you since they will feel betrayed. At least, if you confess them immediately, you will appear sincerely repentant.


3. Do not keep secrets from your partner.

In general, do not hide anything from your girlfriend or boyfriend. Keeping secrets from the individual either means they cannot be trusted, or you are betraying them. You can only keep a secret from your partner if it belongs to someone else—as long as it does not concern your relationship.

Moreover, sharing your innermost thoughts with your partner can actually increase the intimacy between you. Stop looking for a best friend in another person. Make your partner your BFF, your human diary, and confidante.

Also read: How to Build Trust in a Relationship: 14 Effective Tips


4. Make communication a priority.

One of the qualities of a healthy relationship is communication. If the couple prioritizes communication, honesty is not hard to maintain. Having a strong line of communication between two persons improves intimacy, strengthens trust, and solidifies their bond.

Good communication means you are open to each other about anything. The two of you can express your thoughts and feelings without the fear of being judged or rejected.


5. Agree to be open to each other.

If your relationship still must improve on communication, start with agreeing to be open to each other. You and your partner should define openness and figure out how you can achieve it between you.

The process will not be easy, but with the mutual decision to be more open in your relationship, you can soon attain it. You should begin by encouraging each other to talk about what you feel or think about something. Then, the other person should listen without reacting impulsively.


6. Stop jumping to conclusions.

One of the reasons why many people cannot stay honest in their relationships is fear. Once they have done something wrong, they get afraid their partner would hate and leave them. For this reason, they choose to hide things and cover them up as much as they can.

If you want to be honest in your relationship, avoid concluding about your partner’s possible reactions to your mistakes. You are not perfect, and you have to let your partner see that. If that person loves you, they will forgive your mistakes and still accepts you.


7. Be transparent.

Transparency is another effective way to stay honest in your relationship. It puts all areas concerning your relationship in the light, getting rid of chances for temptations to be dishonest or unfaithful to your partner.

To be transparent with your boyfriend or girlfriend means letting each other know of relevant details that could cause suspicion if found hidden. For instance, you should be ready and willing to show your phone or social media accounts to your partner anytime. It does not also hurt to let each other know where you are going and who are with you.


8. Do not be quick to judge your partner.

If you always critic your boyfriend or girlfriend for every small mistake, expect that it will be hard to be honest with that person. Of course, pride would not let you give them the chance to get back at you. For this reason, you would rather hide your mistakes than confess them.

Therefore, be more patient and understanding with your partner. Show that person that you accept their imperfection. If you do this, you can expect the same treatment in return. You will be less afraid to tell the truth.


9. Avoid committing to things you cannot handle.

Commitment is an essential element in a relationship. How you honor your “yes” will establish your reliability in the eyes of your partner. For this reason, be careful in committing to things that you have no plan of doing or you are not sure if you can handle.

For instance, do not agree to a date if your availability for the proposed schedule is still unsure. Your partner will be disappointed if you cancel at the last minute. It would be better to just commit to things that you can surely do.


10. Do not make any promises.

In connection to no. 9, do not give any promises. It is enough that you commit to things you can surely do. Promises have weights that turn into burdens once you cannot fulfill them.

The Bible verse Matthew 5:37 tells us to simply say “yes” or “no”. Avoiding promises can save you from causing disappointments. It can also save you from your partner’s mistrust.


11. Be sincere in your actions.

Sincerity is the sister of honesty. Make sure to be sincere in all the words and actions you show your partner. You must genuinely care for your boyfriend or girlfriend. Avoid doing things just out of obligation.

For instance, when telling your partner “I love you”, say it with conviction and from the bottom of your heart. Or whenever you hold hands while walking, do it not because you want others to envy you but because you are proud of your partner.

Also read: How to be Sincere in a Relationship: 10 Simple Ways


12. Realize that nothing can be permanently hidden.

One thing that you should keep in mind is that dishonesty has its price. No secret is kept hidden so expect that your partner would sooner or later discover your lies.

If you love your boyfriend or girlfriend and do not want to risk losing your relationship, be an honest person. As mentioned above, it is better to confess your mistakes as soon as possible so they can hear them from you firsthand.

Also read: How to be Faithful in a Relationship: 12 Ways


Value Your Partner’s Trust

Many people become dysfunctional in relationships because of trust issues due to their traumatic past. Those who have experienced betrayal by those they loved usually have a hard time trusting again.

Therefore, avoid breaking the trust of your partner. If you really love the person, you will take care of them not just physically but also emotionally and mentally. Save them from the torture that mistrust might cause them because of your dishonesty.

Also read: How to be Respectful in a Relationship: 15 Thoughtful Ways

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